


Before the First Encounter

by Storyteller1358



Series: It Happened in the Days of Esther [1]
Category: Megillat Ester | Book of Esther
Genre: Collection: Purimgifts Day 1, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:07:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22989088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storyteller1358/pseuds/Storyteller1358
Summary: Esther prepares to meet Achashverosh and wonders her future holds.
Series: It Happened in the Days of Esther [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1652152
Comments: 4
Kudos: 8
Collections: Purimgifts 2020





	Before the First Encounter

**Author's Note:**

  * For [citrinesunset](https://archiveofourown.org/users/citrinesunset/gifts).



Tevet, 7th year of the Reign of King Achashverosh

Esther fiddled with her hair as she waited for Hegai to return and to bring her to the king’s chambers. She wondered if she had made a mistake in refusing additional cosmetics and perfumes. Still, she had come to trust Hegai – he seemed to have a soft stop for the women he was in charge of, trying to make their transition to the palace as easy as possible. He wouldn’t give her bad advice intentionally.

The scent of her perfume only made her more anxious. The lemon-myrtle reminded her of Hadassah, who had left her uncle’s home to come here. But she wasn’t Hadassah anymore – she was Esther now. The name itself should remind her. She must be hidden, must not tell anyone who she really is. Mordechai had been very clear about that. She was to be Esther from now on, and as far as she could tell forevermore. Not that it would really matter anyway, she thought, when she had been with Achashverosh and then cast off permanently. The last ten women to be brought to him had not been called back even once. A part of her desperately hoped that she would be the same, but another part rebelled – surely her fate was not to spend the rest of her life locked in the concubine’s harem.

On the other hand, the idea of being favored was perhaps more concerning. From everything she had heard – and palace gossip was possible the only reason most of the residents got up in the morning – the king wasn’t cruel, or even unkind. He was, as far as she could surmise, interested only in his own pleasures and more than happy to let his advisers rule in his place. She did not particularly like the idea of being another one of his toys.

She often felt these days that everything had been taken from her. She had been taken from her home, and now her contact with her uncle, her only remaining relative had been limited to messages passed back and forth with no privacy whatsoever. Even her name had been taken to conceal her true identity. Now she was afraid that one of her last treasures, her dignity, would be taken by the king. She could not imagine being at his beck and call, to be treated like his wine and feasts, just another of his possessions.

Before she could let her mind go too far down that line of thinking she drew herself back. Pitying herself would not help at all. Besides, Mordechai had seemed convinced that there was some larger purpose to all of this, and at times she even believed him. It had happened before – a woman taken to a king, her identity changed for her protection. She recalled well the stories of Sarah and Rivka, who had pretended to be their husband’s sister to keep him safe. Hadn’t they succeeded, and even come out with more riches before? Perhaps she would do the same for her people. But still, she couldn’t help but ponder the costs they had paid. Although, there were those who said that God had protected Sarah and Rivka, that they hadn’t even been touched. She wasn’t sure if she believed them – she could not believe such a reprieve would be in store for her.

There was a knock on the door, and then it opened. She knew instantly that the time had come. Rising, Esther followed Hegai out of the room, and through hallways she had never seen before in her year in the palace. He stopped besides a great door, left open just a crack, and gestured to her to enter. Esther took a deep breath, gathered her courage, and walked in, ready to face her future. 

Image citation: Raddato, C. (2019, May 05). Palace of Darius in Susa. Ancient History Encyclopedia. Retrieved from https://www.ancient.eu/image/10552/ 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for giving me an opportunity to write this.
> 
> I've taken a few bits and pieces of midrash at various points, but mostly I've ignored it in favor of doing my own extrapolation from the text.


End file.
